Sex

I'm going to start typing and I'm going to try not to stop until I've said it all, (well, not all), and I'm going to try not to ramble. I'll just stick straight to the topic. No diversions, no hesitations, just straight to the point. No beating about the bush, that's for sure. No siree, just jumping in to the deep end. Ho hum. Diddly dee. Lalalalala.

They say, that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus.

But sod that, I want sex!

Ok, that's what it comes down to. I'm horny, she isn't.

And it's not a "waiting for the wedding night"-type thing. After all, as I said, we've been together for years. When we met... Phwoar! I couldn't believe it, she'd never tire and was always all over me. And in her past, before me? Well, let's just say I'm aware she had her fair share of fun (certainly more than I've had - yes, I am a little jealous)
But of course, after we moved in together, it phased out.

I can understand that, that's often what happens. You only have to look at most couples around to see the same thing.

But that doesn't help much.

Right now, it's about two months since anything last happened. Before that? Three/four/five months. I'm not sure exactly. I lost count.

...At this point, contrary to what I said earlier (although in keeping with what I said in my previous entry), I ran out of time and have had to continue some hours later. I shall try to continue...

I know it's not just that she doesn't fancy me and is secretly horny. She just isn't horny.

I know that I'm likely sounding like a bit of a typically sex-obsessed bloke now, but allow me please to explain why I miss it. Please note that this list of reasons is not in any particular order, except I think with a tiny element of those which feel most significant coming later in the list. Well, I think so anyway. I haven't written it yet. So here goes:
1. If I were to die without having had any/much more sexual fun and frolics, I would regret it. I see getting married as almost a symbol of things between us staying as they are (after all, remember we have been together for a few years already). Therefore, I feel afraid that I really will feel regretful of this one day in the future when I die.
2. It's fun, and it builds closeness. I miss that we hardly ever kiss other than a quick peck on the lips anymore. (I wonder if we get a "You may kiss the bride" ?) I think perhaps that part of this is that she's almost afraid to go for a "proper kiss" in case I get "all excited" and think she's horny when she isn't.
3. I really miss the opportunity to make her feel good. I mean, you seem to hear about blokes who enjoy a good shag and don't really care what happens to the woman. Well, I love that bit. I thought it was fantastic - the sights, the sounds, the thought that I did that! (Maybe that's selfish after all, I don't know, but I just thought it was great)

I think that's it, although I have lost my train of thought.

Based on what I've said so far, I can predict some of the responses. Don't presume I've finished on this subject, or that I'm a selfish bastard who doesn't deserve any sex anyway (Hopefully I haven't come across quite THAT bad though).

I will try to continue this later today, although I'm not sure I'll have the time.