Random Dumping

Right, I should have gone to bed earlier (I was tired & sleepy) but I wanted to get some things done first, so I didn't. And now? Having just gone to bed? I decided I'm not only not sleepy, but also seem to be hungry. On top of that, I've a hundred random things floating through my thoughts.

So, by snacking while blogging, perhaps I can eliminate some of those problems ;)

Oh... And I'll get my council tax payments sorted out too. I keep thinking of that when I can't do anything about it and then not thinking to do anything when I can. That'll be something else off my mind so I don't need to worry about leaving it too late.
...Right, that's that sorted.

You know, I cannot for the life of me imagine why, but I happened to 'notice' the lyrics to this song earlier...

And I'm thinking, thinking, thinking, think
Thinking till I'm nearly dead
Do you remember when you were young?
Do you remember what your mother said?

She said, don't ever think, ever think, ever think too much
and don't ever think, ever think, ever think too much
and don't ever think, ever think, ever think too much
and don't ever think, ever think, ever think too much

So that's Don't Ever Think (Too Much) by The Zutons. Ho hum. ;)

I think I had a pretty good Christmas, all things considered. Oh, it even started a little early when I received a surprise 'present' on Christmas Eve Eve :) (Well if Christmas get an 'Eve', surely Christmas Eve can have one too? ;) )
I can't say I specifically missed Mrs M over Christmas. But then I don't really in general at the moment. Hey, my crisps have a "best before" of only February! That's only like three months since I bought them. Bit of a rip off. (Err, sorry, I just finished a packet of crisps and the empty packet is sitting in front of me)

...When anyone asks, I relate it to a weekend alone. Everyone likes a nice weekend alone for a change. It's like that, but long. I assume a bunch of stuff will properly hit me at some point.
Why do I assume that? Well, I catch tiny hints occasionally now... And... If I don't, I think it suggests things were worse than I realised. And I'd feel guilty for not feeling anything. Most of what I do feel at the moment is guilt.

I've not regretted my decision at all (yet). I wonder at the fact I'm looking at buying expensive things like a bed and a sofa and lots of furniture, as it does not suggest temporary. On the other hand, I haven't actually bought any of those things yet ;) So maybe sub-conciously I don't want to do that... Or perhaps, just perhaps, I'm not so good at making decisions ;) Well, I think that varies. In this case, I've just not really formed enough of an opinion on anything yet.
Oh, I don't think I want a divan base on a bed though. As I've said earlier today, I don't think the drawers would be THAT useful, and a great big space could be useful if you have something obscure to put under it...
Also, it's a great hiding place, under the bed! ;) I can't tell you how many times I nipped under the bed to surprise Mrs M when she came up and I was nowhere to be seen ;) Hey, yes it's silly, but does it matter if it gets a smile? :)

I have felt for some time that I suspect at some point, even if I decide I do regret where I am and want to go back, I am going to have to challenge myself and confront some of my worries. Still, I've always liked a good challenge ;)

After all, as Ripley said in Aliens... "I say we take off and nuke the whole goddamn place from orbit."

Oh wait, I wanted the next line...

"It's the only way to be sure."

I think I'm done for now. I've got some more generic Christmassy bits I'd like to blog at some point, but they're not important to right now and all that's zipping through my mind.

Ah, and as The Feeling - Never Be Lonely plays, I remember hearing Jakatta - Ever So Lonely earlier. Well bugger me, being an uneducated heathen when it comes to music, I only just found out that was a cover of a song by Monsoon in the early 80s. Completely failed to be able to check the lyrics though. Strange how some songs have like 100 pages up with lyrics but others don't seem to have any. Anyway, I remember when I first heard that song I simply liked it. But in times since then, and I'm talking quite some time ago here (I think before I had even thought about starting a blog), feeling sad as I thought about it. Gosh, what a musical post this has turned into!

Well. Not a musical post. It's not loading a song in the background now, or some terrible plinky-plonky ring-tone to play at you ;)

But... anyway. There's everything that's gone through my mind. Perhaps if my brain were in a reasonable state I would continue my path of denial on some of that as usual ;) (Well, not denial... more just... public non-admittance ;)

[yawn]

Slightly less hungry now. Still not actually sleepy, just bloody tired. I think I'll flop onto my sofa. It may be inflatable, but it's still floppable onto :)
Oh, although sitting on it much in my trainers isn't a good thing. I seem to turn into a large battery.

Good night ;) Congratulations on making it through my ramble to the end ;)